After retirement dilemma

madathil mhanian By madathil mhanian, 25th Sep 2014 | Follow this author | RSS Feed | Short URL
Posted in Wikinut>Writing>Family

Whether a person should continue to live in the same city even after retirement? Moving out to home town for more peace, less din and little serenity is a natural feeling.

After Retirement dilemma

To be or not to be that is the question. No, I am not plagiarizing Shakespeare. But I am as much puzzled, perplexed or despondent as the character he has created, Prince Hamlet. While his uncertainty was about life, death and suicide my dilemma is about is the path I have to take when I am at crossroads. Back to my home town or to continue in this concrete jungle. Recently retired souls, fellow Romans and countrymen, lend me your helping hand…..

In another two months (if I am lucky they will extend it till March next year, but for practical purposes let us say two months) I will be attending my Sent-off party and with a garland and sweet box they will pack me off, to my home. Wait a minute, not before forcing me to hear some kind words, though at least some of them may be thinking the other way in their minds. I will be lucky if it lasts less than an hour; but I am not that much of an optimist. Let us be practical okay? By the time the last person- I think it will be peon Dolasingham, we have something called hierarchy you know- finish his share I will adorn a bright halo at right, left and center of my head. Will my wife and children will be able to recognize me? Help me God.

Thinking that this will be the last obligation, one kind soul will agree to take out his/her vehicle to drop me back to home. After a customary coffee and snacks (we are Indians, we must offer something to our guests) and a mini encore of the speeches of the sent-off party they will depart. Now I am left with the beg question. What next? As far as financial security is concerned, there are no issues. The agents of the insurance companies, ‘gentle’ pushes from my wife to invest regularly in bank deposits and jewels though some jealous minds will say that more is in jewels, PF and the Pension have ensured that I am still ‘sound’ financially even after retirement.
As there is no need to run and catch the right train-Eight thirty is fine, Eight thirty five is okay, but Eight forty is disaster was the dictum-should I continue to live in this concrete jungle anymore? With the advancement of technology I can get connected to people, banks and relatives without much hassle nowadays. There is some land which I have invested in early part of my career in my home town. A little re allocation of my savings and deposits building a small house there is not the big issue. But the biggest hindrance is my wife. Will she be on the same page with me about this major decision of relocating?

As there was two months only for the D-day, I opened up the topic with my wife on a Sunday last week. I mean I opened up and then it was monologue all the way till I went to bed that day. What will happen to her numerous clubs where she is a rank and file member, executive member, steering committee member and a Secretary post in the clubs? Mrs. XX and Mrs. YY are already devising heinous plans to put her down under a peg or two. Wont it be easy for them now if we decide to move-out.? How will she make the weekly visits-she visits twice though she says one only -to our daughter who is married and settled in other part of the city? More over Cheemachu (pet name for my Son Sreenivasan) usually comes once in a year to our house only first, as airport in the city is nearer to our house than to his in-laws house. Now he has to travel another 8 hours to meet us in home town. For the last twenty years she is living in this house. Likewise she numbered out one by one reason vetoing the decision to move-out till I went to bed.

Some of them are childish excuses, but there are some valid points as well such as the traveling time involved if my son or daughter wishes to visit us. But are those visits that frequent? Resigning a Club secretary post is a crime?; after all it is not UN Secretary General post. I could have put across this as a defense argument to her, but as peace in the family and a good night’s sleep is more important I kept my thoughts against that and feigned to be sleepy soon after dinner that day.

Now I have to take a decision. Thinking the way the spiraling up (they always are) cost of materials and labor, the earlier I take a decision the better about building a house in hometown. Engineer Ramki, a family friend will be able to come up with a design that I have in my mind with some minor alterations that fits into my ‘budget’. Getting a good internet connection will solve the issue of getting in touch with friends and relatives in this IT age. Let Cheemachu take that extra 8hours travel once in a year to meet us. Then visiting the daughter, she has to make some compromises about the number and frequency. I can breathe fresh air, walk barefoot in the soil, bathe in the river and visit the temple which has the serene atmosphere even now.

These are the pros and cons of moving-out to the home town, at least in my case. But as I stated in the beginning ‘to be or not to be’ is the question. Any suggestions...


Children, Home Town, Native Palce, Old Age, Pension, Relocation, Security

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author avatar madathil mhanian
from Coimbatore, worked as a Zonal Sales Manager for a Pharma company. At present earns as a Freelance Trainer for Pharma companies.

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author avatar GV Rama Rao
25th Sep 2014 (#)

I, normally, don't suggest. Since you asked for it, here it goes. 1. You and your wife need to be on the same page but not place. Second,the halo you acquire during the party will not vanish the next day. It'll haunt you for long if you continue to live in the concrete jungle. Lastly, shifting to your hometown is the best option to you but not for the family.

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author avatar madathil mhanian
25th Sep 2014 (#)

thank you Sir, for your comment on my article. regards madathil mhanian

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