Becoming a better person

Memba Ben By Memba Ben, 27th Dec 2016 | Follow this author | RSS Feed | Short URL
Posted in Wikinut>Writing>Personal Experiences

A look back at the journey I had to take in order to change from who I was to who I currently am.

" The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new." - Socrates

I’ll always be the first to tell you that I was a terrible person.

I wasn’t a good friend, wasn't reliable, demanded a lot, and as a result, made everything about me.

I lived this way for quite a while until the Good Lord decided to deservedly knock me down a peg or two.

Now, what I’d usually do is get back on my feet and continue on with life but, in this particular time, I couldn’t as there was no one around to help me.

I hadn’t realized it at the time but my actions had burned bridges with a lot of good people.

This epiphany left me thinking about all the people I had wronged, how many bridges I torched and how I wished that things had been different.

It was at that moment when I decided to work towards becoming a better person. However, it wouldn’t be as easy as I made it sound. I felt that in order to kick start my change, I needed to admit my faults to myself and to the people I wronged.

I found that the only way to do that was to apologize to them and hope that they would give me the opportunity to earn back their trust.

And so I did.

I sincerely apologized, accepted responsibility for my actions, acknowledged the pain that I caused, and told them that I planned to change. The only thing I needed from them was for them to grant me the opportunity to earn their esteem once again.

As you probably know, the business of apologizing is a tricky one. You could say all the right things in the world but in the end, the choice lies with the person you are apologizing to as they have every right to accept or decline your apology. Whether good or bad, the trick is to accept and respect whatever decision they come to as to show that you are indeed truthful to your pledge to change your ways.

I was lucky that my family and friends were willing to give it another shot. But that didn’t mean that I could coast on their goodwill: I had to prove that I meant what I said.

Using my faults as a reminder to push me into change was my motivator. I remembered what type of person I used to be, what I had lost and used that as fuel to drive me to my goals. I used it as a reminder to never be that person which is what led me into what I am today:

A less terrible person.

I guess that what I’m trying to say is that we can’t expect ourselves to be perfect people but at the same time, we can’t use it as an excuse to be bastards. To become a better person; one needs to recognize what he/she is, encourage the good, remember the bad, forgive ourselves, ask for forgiveness from others and use all that as a reminder to “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”.


Personal Development, Personal Experience, Personal Growth

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author avatar Memba Ben
Just want to thank you folks for taking the time to read my articles!

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