Can You Truly Forgive and Forget?

LoverOfGOD By LoverOfGOD, 8th Sep 2013 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Writing>Religion>Christianity

God said that we should always forgive one another. That's easier said than done. My quest to understand God, brings me to the following questions. Have you truly forgiven those who have hurt you? Are we really able to forgive one another as God does? Or is God's level of forgiveness out of reach?

I Forgive You...I Think?

I sat in on a bible study about a month ago with the topic of Forgiveness. It was a very interesting conversation on a very interesting topic, "Can We Truly Forgive." The participants gave a wide range of answers, and examples, but one remark kept the conversation flowing, and that remark was, "Is it really forgiving, if I no longer want to be friends with that person after I've forgiven them?"

I thought this was very intriguing because I was thinking the same thing. Jesus said to forgive those who sin against us (Matthew 18:22). However, that's not as easy as it sounds. Maybe a deity can forgive easily, but what about us with our human limitations (Micah 7:18).

The bible study group believes that forgiving takes a lot more than what a person's actually willing to give. For example, If a friend forgives you for hurting them in some way, their only willing to forgive you to a certain point. They're willing to forgive you but certain conditions come with the forgiveness. Imagine that you forgave the person who hurt you, but still, they're no longer allowed in your home. Also, you may no longer desire a friendship with that person. So, is no longer being friends with that person still within the category of forgiveness, after all, you forgave them, right.

I'm not quite so sure if I would agree, but I'm also not sure if I disagree. I look at forgiveness in the same way as the bible study group. I have forgiven people, but now I feed them through a long handled spoon. We all know what real forgiveness is (Luke 11:1-4), but who's willing to make themselves a victim of the same circumstances again. If we re-friend the one who hurt us, won't there always be lingering suspicions about that friends every move. Anything they do would make us think their plotting against us and we'll put up our guard. So, isn't it best to just avoid all the aggravation and forgive the person, but at the same time end the friendship.

Still, if you read about forgiveness in the bible, you'll notice that human forgiveness still falls short of Gods forgiveness (Isaiah 43:25). God forgives and forgets. I seriously doubt if any human being can doing that. In the Lord's Prayer, we ask God to forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. God forgives us in expectations that we'll forgive. So if we're not truly forgiving anyone, then.......

In conclusion, a group of people in a bible study, came to the same end result about forgiveness, we can truly forgive others if it involves:
(1) 100% forgiveness, the betrayal must never be mentioned again
(2) no requirements or restrictions on the friendship,
(3) wiping it from your memory, and
(4) continuing to trust the person completely.

What do you thing about the conclusion made by the bible study group? Should something be added or taken away? I would love any comments to this question, it will indeed help me on my quest to understanding God.

Praise Jehovah, Elohim, Adonia, Yahweh,



Forgive, Forgive Forget, Forgive Friend Or Family Member, Forgive Yourself, Forgiven, Forgiveness, Forgiveness Conditional, Forgiving, Forgiving Oneself, Forgiving Others

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author avatar LoverOfGOD
This author is an aspiring Freelance Writer & Indie Author with works on the Amazon Kindle Platform. She has a degree in Business Adm, Web Design Spcl & Computer Info Sys.

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author avatar Susanto Sen
9th Sep 2013 (#)

The idea of forgiveness by Jesus Christ was only to negate negative karma so that the tit for tat injuries wouldn't continue life after life. But as you said, it is not easy to forgive, which is why all religions suggest the chanting or meditating on god's name which makes a man detached from mundane matters and become spiritual. When a man becomes detached, he automatically doesn't feel any harm done to him. This is what is called true forgiveness! According to Hinduism, such detachment comes with great effort, making one believe that he is not the body but a soul (part of god).

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author avatar Stella Mitchell
9th Sep 2013 (#)

My friend , let me try to explain my limited understanding of what God is saying in the Lord's prayer , and why .. Firstly ...God is Love , and He only wants the very best for all of us , but He knows we live in a fallen world when sin abounds . We will sin as well as others against us , and this leads to broken relationships not only with the other person , but also with ourselves and God the Father , and to restore relationship with Him ( because He is Holy ) we first must remove the hindrance that blocks our way , and that is brought about by forgiving others ...The Hindrance is then no more , God forgives us , and our relationship with Him is restored ....then He takes the sting out of the action that has been forgiven . Sometimes this does mean being removed from the one who hurts us , but as long as we harbour no ill against them goes on in peace .
God bless you

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author avatar Clarence Schreiber
14th Sep 2013 (#)

Forgiving can be hard at times, especially if it is a grudge against someone. We must overcome that and truely forgive. God always forgives us for our sins and if God can forgive so can we. Thank you for sharing this article.

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