Chapter I : At The Back Of My Mind

Yumi Miyako By Yumi Miyako, 28th Oct 2010 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Writing>Diaries

Flashbacks. These so reminds me of how I am before. When it's easy, I'll do anything to turn back the hands of time and correct everything. For some reason, this becomes my outlet on love frustrations, painting and writing my dreams again.

In Deep thoughts

This is how things should be. Hwy can't I go somewhere quiet and free from teases? I mean seeing him with someone else is not bad at all. If regretting that we broke up without any closure, I will never be this tough towards his kind. His absence is even a blessing in disguise. If he didn't left in a sudden without saying goodbye, I would not realize that he's not the guy worth saving a relationship with. Of course, it always takes two to tango. I would not be this experienced in facing people of how I rise from a deep fall.

Wow! I never thought this would introduce my first note. It's more of a self nag page. Well, I think this is better though, getting online and scan over the pages of my past. Good option.

I wonder what would I be like when I turn the age of 70. Will I be a childish grandma, poor decision making or just plainly losing bits of my memory? I hope I'll remain this way. I have little tools as this. This is going to remind me how I was at 18.

This time, my goals are set. Looks like there will be lots of writing to look forward to. What would be my next blah blah be. will I be able to bear some harsh things that would cross my clear path?

In another case, mom's dream last night is quite interesting. She dreamed of a wedding event. Too bad, she can't tell who's getting married. All she can remember is wedding decorations. At the back of mind, will I ever met the right guy and get married? Silly! Of course not at 18, it's too early to get marry. Hilarious, I can't even picture myself walking on the isle with all eyes on me. It's pretty weird but attending those wedding events and looking at those walking brides on the isle makes me feel embarrassed. It's really weird but I guess it's normal for some singles like me who's not really truly madly deeply in love with someone. Four guys who made my sleepless nights and cries are enough or maybe I just don't like the feeling of being stared at even if it's non occasional. I'm tired, at least my dad is there. He's a living proof that all guys differ from each other at some instance. However, things will never be the same again. That slightly gave me a dip on a bowl of soup, all I can do is give a sigh.

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Tags

Aging, Bride, Chapter, Cheating, Dreams, Flashbacks, Frustrations, Guys, In Deep Thoughts, In His Viens, Love, Marriage, Relationships, Single, Single Women, Sleepless Nights, Wedding Events

Meet the author

author avatar Yumi Miyako
I am actually fond of reading. I'm still exploring my skills on writing and how to put my dreams into words.

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Comments

author avatar Denise O
2nd Dec 2010 (#)

True, when you met the right one.
You will walk in front of anyone to be with him.
It will happen in time.
You're still young.
Thank you for sharing.:)

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