Death of a child

Sandralee By Sandralee, 15th Jul 2012 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Writing>Diaries

I am angry, hurt, where did it go wrong
It has been nearly 7 years my son,
You have been gone.
Death is so .......final
No words can it mend
It is over.. The life that you lived.
Kainalu your son
Looks just like you
When you took your own life
Did you think you won?
Hokulani is a beauty your first girl
Her hair is soft and has a slight curl.
Are you watching her grow
As she turns to a teen?
Anuhea the blonde one
She looks just like me
Those are her words
She uttered to me.

Children

I had 7 children 5 boys 2 girls.
The writings i leave here one day they will read. Thank you everyone else.
Some times in life we make choices, good or bad they are still choices.
The past we carry but can not change.
That is what has created me..... The woman inside.
There are no road maps in life that you can see where it ends.
No final destination for someone to see. Where ever my lifes journey takes me
That journey for me will still be alone.
Sometimes as i watch couples as they stroll on the street... I think....will that ever be me?
Sometimes it saddens me to be alone. But it will never keep me down.
I hope that there are others who can see thru my words my pain.
I am stronger than i used to be, and i get up every day to try again.

Tags

Suicide And The People Left Behnd, Suicide Silence

Meet the author

author avatar Sandralee
The love for my children drives me to leave a legacy of hope and faith, a desire to attain the highest goals and never limit their chances to learn and grow.

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Comments

author avatar Retired
15th Jul 2012 (#)

I am speechless. Wonderful and sad and heart wrenching at the same time! Keep writing. :)

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author avatar Sivaramakrishnan A
16th Jul 2012 (#)

Life is a journey of ups and downs. When we are down, up is the only way to go. Best wishes, Oliva, and thanks for the share - siva

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author avatar Tranquilpen
19th Jul 2012 (#)

Hello Sandra, words from a stranger to your circumstances seem hollow and with not much inspiration, I know, for on my own journey, I can relate to your emotional anguish although my path is nothing like yours. I none the less feel compelled to share just these few words with you. The darkest part of the night is just before daybreak. My dear late dad used to say those words at times when I was experiencing deep heartache. At the time I felt no comfort from hearing them, but as life continued and I grew older, they gradually started to mean something very special to me. You see my friend, I have discovered, that soon after the spiritual or mental anguish we sometimes experience, the Creator also gives us the capacity to forgive and move on. If your hurting has pushed you into a deep and dark place, you can move forward. May you find yourself now moving forward from such a place. God bless

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author avatar Sandralee
19th Jul 2012 (#)

Thank you it is because of the strength that God has given me that I have a journey yet to encounter. He has never left me and his guidance and strength has carried me in times iI had no strength to carry on. With the comfort of him in my life he rewards my patience to free myself from my pain. Your father was wise. I too am on my journey to a place that is distant when my time before him comes I will be stronger in wisdom.

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author avatar Retired
28th Jul 2012 (#)

Very heart felt. I have also lost a child. I wish you the best.

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