Duped!

Memba Ben By Memba Ben, 7th Jul 2017 | Follow this author | RSS Feed | Short URL http://nut.bz/5psbwdhu/
Posted in Wikinut>Writing>Personal Experiences

Beauty and shrewdness are a dangerous combination. This is a story of how I experienced that first hand.

How I got hoodwinked by a beautiful woman.

After a hellacious week, a friend and I knocked off from work to go grab a couple of beers at the local mall.

Now at the time, the mall had this thing where it permitted companies to rent out stalls to advertise and promote their goods. On this particular Saturday, they were doing some charity drive for the local library.

Manning the stall was a couple of ladies. One was fairly attractive but the other was just…to sum it up, she was breathtaking.

I mean Jesus Christ…she was just drop dead gorgeous, eye-catching, stunning, striking, enchanting (yes, I am using a thesaurus).

I’d continue using synonyms but I think a quote from Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman from their book Good Omens would say it best:

"The men in the room suddenly realized that they did not want to know her better. She was beautiful, but she was beautiful in the way a forest fire was beautiful: something to be admired from a distance, not up close."

She was all that… and she was coming up to my friend and I.

Now, usually I am a level headed person but when it comes to beautiful women, I’m a total sucker.

This lady came up to us, and started her sales pitch to get us to donate to this worthy cause. My friend immediately saw through the charade and immediately gave her a firm no.

She turned to me, started the same song and dance and while I had planned to firmly decline as my friend previously had, her eyes just got me into a trance and…look, I don’t remember much of what she said. All I know is that she was stupidly beautiful, was going on about the preservation of library being at risk, donations were needed and I had money.

Now in my wallet, I had a couple of notes with varying value. My plan was to donate a small amount, get in her good books and try hook up her numbers but I was so transfixed to her mesmerizing beauty that when I opened my wallet, my fingers passed the note I intended to give and landed on the much larger denomination note.

She saw the note and with a beautiful smile, extended her hand to receive it. The only time I saw the note was when I was about to hand it to her.

I finally saw the note… and I realized just how much of an idiot I was. Why didn’t I make sure I was pulling out the right note? I was silently cursing myself. On top of that, I was caught in a situation where my hand was in the process of handing the money over so I couldn’t take it back.

I looked back up and I saw that she was still smiling; only this time it had a sinister hint to it; so as if to say:

Got you

It was then when I knew…I fucked up.

She tricked me, like she probably tricked a thousand other idiots like me. Like a moth to a flame, she lured my stargazed ass and in an instant, struck with the swiftness of a cobra.

So with no other alternative; I gave her the money with the world’s most painfully fake smile whereas inside, I was repeatedly saying one word:

fffuuuuuccckkk

She thanked me for my contribution but her words rung hollow. To make matters worse, as soon as my friend and I began to leave, she lured another moth to her beautiful flame.

With my friend laughing at my stupidity and my rose tinted glasses falling off, I finally saw her for what she really was:

A damn good sales person.

Tags

Funny Story, Humor, Personal Experience, Personal Story, True Story

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author avatar Memba Ben
Just want to thank you folks for taking the time to read my articles!

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author avatar tootsieharveystories
17th Jul 2017 (#)

A hard lesson learned?

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author avatar Memba Ben
19th Jul 2017 (#)

Hi tootsie

An expensive lesson learnt. What's worse is that I was in sales so I should've seen the ruse.

It doesn't help that I have a terminal condition (I suffer from a severe case of stupidity) and it tends to come up from time to time.

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