Im Nick Robertson By Im Nick Robertson, 17th Dec 2011 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Writing>Short Stories

This is a poem, originally written for performance, after being given the title 'Internet Grooming' It is more hard hitting than my other stuff but I thought I would share it. Adult Content Warning.

'Internet Grooming'

There is nothing different; you get an announcement, meaning someone has sent you something that is meant to get your attention.

My phone vibrated just as I got home, and as I took a look I said I had a friend request on FaceBook.

A girl, I don’t recognise the name. A good looking girl…Forget the name accept.

The rest of the story unravels like a thread of cotton caught on a shred of wood protruding from a tree as I walk through the leafy land and try to understand why my sweater is getting shorter and now I know I should have thought ta, cut that string and relieve my clothing of the slow unravelling, rather than leave it and end up in the leaves with a cold shoulder and only one sleeve.

I didn’t think about it and it wasn’t until I was going to bed that I had an email from the girl, it read. I have seen you in town on a night out around, I found you through a friend of a friend, so I took the first step to send you a request, you seem like a nice guy, I hope you don’t think I'm weird, I’m not, I’m just shy.

I emailed her back, saying thank you, asked a few questions about who she knew and if she was a uni and after that she messaged back and so started the back and fourth talking more and more…days past, a week, we messaged every day of every week, it was the last thing I did before I went to sleep… I liked her, I never realised how you could like someone without seeing them with your eyes without them physically being in your life but…I liked her.

It was this blind naiveté which led me to believe that she liked me and It was like I could see her when we talked online, her webcam was broken but its ok so is mine, I wanted to see what she was like in reality, she sent pictures, it was like cyber flirting, some with her on holiday and some with her and her dogs in, some with…well…cyber flirting.

We joked about meeting up, going for a coffee or a drink; it was just an idea at first until we had time to think. She asked what my address was, I decided what would be best was meeting in town to save the cost of travel, she lived the other side of town, getting all the way to each others would cost a lot so I thought Costa coffee? she doesn’t drink coffee a lot so we decided something better, settled on a drink in The Forrester’s a pub closer to hers, but more relaxed atmosphere, I agreed and so the date was set and in a week I bet I will be able to say I met the girl of my dreams.

I told all this to a mate of mine, a great mate , friends for a long time, I trusted him, he said she must have been mistaken, she’s too good looking, it be a shame to be wasting her time on me, said she was probably searching his name. He wished me luck, told me to get over there quick and give her a good F…I told him to grow up.

I got a letter in the mail and I could tell from the weight and touch that it had much more than just paper in it. Like a kid at Christmas getting something of my Christmas wish list I ripped the letter open to find a necklace. It had a letter attached ‘Bring this to the place we will meet, then I will know your face’. How romantic.

The day I had been waiting for came, the sun was setting, no rain. I ordered a cab which arrived at 7 30, should get me there by 8, meeting at 8 15 so I wont be late. The cab pulled up outside the pub, I paid and pushed the door closed and with a thud I felt my throat close up like I swallowed the whole globe and the butterflies in my stomach took control.

I found a seat near the door, the pub was busy and bustling, the hustling of bodies all around the room, laughter and chatter, filled my ears as the warm glow of the light filled my eyes. I ordered a pint and was lucky enough to find a small table in a tight corner for 2 by the door. I sat, nervously shuffled s people shuffled through the main entrance, I started thinking of what I would say, in a trance I hope she likes me. I put the necklace out on the table, in clear view so that I knew she was able to see it and spot me…

My fun thoughts of the night to come where interrupted it was as if someone might have come and blew out my candles flame. Behind me I heard clearly, my name. I instantly knew it wasn’t her that I heard, the voice was low and my mind was disturbed, my head turned to see a large built man, with a long coat on and a knife in his hand, My reaction was to get up and run but he quickly stopped that with his free hand and his thumb pushed into the side of my neck…

His knife was clutched in a solid fist, I couldn’t scream or I would bleed was absolute promise. He got me up and out of my seat, outside he took me and down the street, I looked in people’s eyes, their cars and homes but among all these people I have never felt more alone. I know now I should have punched and kicked but in the moment my brain told me to go with it.

A door was in front of me, dark blue in colour, the number 11 in gold in the corner, I muttered, please don’t hurt me you can take my money, he opened the door. I swear I won’t say anything, just let me go, I was getting upset as he pushed me down onto the floor and my face hit the carpet. He bound my hands; I still have the scars where I struggled as I was tied up for hours.

I was put in the upstairs bathroom and the door was locked, all I remember was being cold…

This had all happened so fast, my mind couldn’t keep track, I tried to put the pieces together I heard footsteps coming up, the stairs getting closer and closer, my face shrivelled up and my eyes where closed for when the door burst open and a man burst in I was lifted and taken to another room…

I have never been so confused, I have never not understood, I have never known anything like what I know now. My whole body was still, it was like time stood with me, all I could see was my reflection in a TV. I shouted so loud but thank god he covered my face and head, if I had seen my face on that screen I would have rather been dead.

I can’t remember getting home, to my uni house, housemates out, all alone. I sat in the shower and cried for hours. I was so cold…I lay in bed, I wish I could erase my head, because the dread of it all coming back, flooding in, opening up the gates and rushing in is terrifying.

I went into class the next day, I sat at the back and my friend asked how it went, did you give her a good F…

I told him she didn’t turn up.

I’m cold.


Adult, Adult Content, Adult Humour, Grooming, Internet, Poem, Poem About Fear, Poem About Life, Poem Of Agony, Poem Of Sadness, Poem On Life, Poem Poetry, Poems, Poems About Life, Social, Social Anxiety, Social Media, Social Networking, Social Networks

Meet the author

author avatar Im Nick Robertson
Hey I'm Nick Robertson. Actor, Writer, Poet, Comedian and none of the above. Enjoy...

Follow me on Twitter! @ImNickRobertson

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author avatar Buzz
7th Jan 2012 (#)

Hey, Nick, nice to see you back. Excellent come-back article you've got here. Happy New year, my friend.

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