How Can I Get Over a Broken Heart.

Hanson By Hanson, 16th Oct 2014 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Writing>Religion>Christianity

There is no question that breakups can be painful and heartbroken, and that it's difficult to trust and love again. But there are ways to get past the pain as you read down the following advice.

The Broken Heart.

You just know this is the one you will marry. You enjoy each others company, you share common interests, and you sense a mutual attraction. Then, suddenly, the relationship dies, exploding in a burst of anger-or melting in tears.

In his book, The Chemistry of Love Dr. Michael Liebowitz likened the onset of love to the rush of a powerful drug. But like a drug, such love can trigger raging 'withdrawal symptoms' if it dies. And it makes little influence whether the love is mere infatuation or the 'real thing.' Both can creates dizzying highs-and agonizing lows if the relationship ends.

The feeling of rejection, hurt, and perhaps outrage that come in the wake of a breakup may thus sour your view of the future. One young woman speaks of herself as 'wounded' because of being jilted. "I can only be a 'Hi, how are you?' person (with the opposite sex) now," she says. "I am not letting any person get close to me." The deeper the commitment you feel in a relationship, the deeper the hurt its breakup can be.

Yes, indeed, the freedom to court whom you please carries a hefty price tag; the real possibility of rejection. There simply is no guarantee that true love will grow. So if someone began courting you with true intentions but later concluded that marriage would be unwise, you have not necessarily been dealt with unfairly.

The Problem Looms.

The problem is, even when a breakup is handled with the utmost tact and kindness, you are still bound to feel hurt and rejected. This is no reason to loose your self-esteem, however. The fact that you were not "right" in this person's eyes does not mean that you will not be just right in the eyes of someone else!

Try putting the defunct romance in a cool perspective. The breakup may very well have spotlighted disturbing things about the person you were involve with-emotional immaturity, indecision, inflexibility, intolerance, a lack of consideration for your feelings. These are hardly desirable qualities in a marriage mate.

What if the breakup is entirely one-sided and you are convinced that a marriage would have work out well? Certainly you have a right to let the other person know how you feel. Perhaps there have simply been some misunderstandings. Emotional ranting and raving accomplishes little. And if he or she insist on splitting up, there is no need for you to humiliate yourself, tearfully begging for the affections of someone who obviously has no feelings for you.

Solomon said there is "a time to seek and a time to give up as lost." (Ecclesiastes 3:6) What if you have strong reason to suspect that you were being used by someone who never had a sincere interest in marriage in the first place? You need not resort to vindictive reprisals. Be assured that his or her deviousness is not unnoticed by God. His word says; "The cruel person is bringing ostracism upon his own organism" Proverbs 11:17 compare Proverbs 6:12-15

Be Cheerful It's a Matter of Time.

From time to time, you may still be tormented by loneliness or romantic memories. If so, it's all right to have a good cry. It also help to get busy, perhaps in some physical activity or the Christian ministry. (Proverbs 18:1). Keep your mind on things that are cheerful and up-building. (Philippians 4:8) confide in a close friend (Proverbs 18:24).

Your parents may also be of great comfort and help, even if you feel you are old enough to be independent. (Proverbs 23:22) and above all confide in God.

You may now see the need to work on certain aspects of your personality. Your vision of what you want in a marriage mate may be clearer than ever. And having love and lost, you may decide to handle courtship a bit more prudently should a desirable person come along again-the likelihood of which may be greater than you think.

Tags

Breakups, Defunct Romance, Feelings Of Rejection, Honest Intentions, Loss Of A Relationship, Loss Of Self-Esteem, Mere Infatuation, Some Misunderstandings, Work On Your Personality

Meet the author

author avatar Hanson
Am a safety Professional down to earth, with passion for nature and the environment. My writing will focus on Safety and Environmental issues with other issues related to the children.

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Comments

author avatar Fern Mc Costigan
29th Oct 2014 (#)

Awesome post and interesting piece as well!

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author avatar Hanson
29th Oct 2014 (#)

Fern, you welcome and thanks for your good review.

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author avatar Helen Thomas
14th Nov 2014 (#)

Very practical, down-to-earth, and sensible advice. Thanks for sharing ~ Hanson. Richest blessings to you.

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author avatar Hanson
15th Nov 2014 (#)

Helen thanks for your comment and review.

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