How to disintegrate new chairs

Marzeus von Hemelen By Marzeus von Hemelen, 16th Oct 2015 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Writing>Diaries

There are many ways to destroy things, but some ways are more interesting than others. An interesting way that was introduced to us recently, was Harrison and Mary's way of destroying their brand new furniture.

Buying the most expensive chairs from the Rand, because local furniture just ain't good enough for Mary

When we returned from Cape Town, Harrison and his wife Mary stayed behind in Halfway House in the Rand, for they wanted to go buy furniture the next day.

(A big fight ensued again between Mary and Elmarie over who should use the Halfway House motorcar, but in the end because Stingley had asked first he got to use it.)

The day Father and I had been for our Holistic Health treatment and went back to Rand Estate to pick up Mother, there was also a box with two chairs in the living room that Harrison wanted us to take home to Voortrekkerdorp for them. However we didn't have space, so Uncle Gus and Auntie René would take it when they're done helping Auntie Marienne move.

The other six chairs, Harrison and Mary transported home themselves.

Sending the chairs to hell

However, life has a sick sense of humor, as we all know: It would appear the day they bought their eight new chairs, costing a thousand rand each, they put the six they could take themselves, on the back of their bakkie and drove home.

But, by the time they reached Unitown about an hour and a half's drive further, they noticed the chairs are no longer there.

So, back they drove in the dark, to go see if they can find any sign along the way of their chairs.

All they found were a few wood splinters and pieces of box. The chairs have basically completely disintegrated when they fell off the vehicle, and whatever might have been left must have been removed by passers-by.

Why didn't they tie their chairs down with ropes or belts you say? Yes, that seems like a very good idea NOW doesn't it :) But, as it is, they simply didn't. A decision they regret now, for sure.

Mary cries about it to Father on the phone, and chi-ching! Father agrees to pay them half of the cost for the lost chairs. The other half he says they have to pay themselves, so they can learn out of their mistake.

I don't see why Father thinks he should in any way pay for the damage that he had absolutely no hand in, but I guess when your children and children-in-law cry out their disappointments with you, you want to help make them feel slightly better again. I suppose if I ever suffer damage, I would be just too glad if somebody helped me carry the cost too.

The lesson in this is: Always tie your furniture down if you transport them. They may seem heavy enough to remain stable and in place while you drive, but physics has a mind of its own.

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Chairs, Destroy, Destruct, Destruction, Furniture, Incinerate, Moving, Vehicle

Meet the author

author avatar Marzeus von Hemelen
I like eggs for breakfast. I live on top of a hill inside a beautiful but old dwelling complex. I like to take life in through my senses and then give feedback through my writing.

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author avatar Fern Mc Costigan
18th Oct 2015 (#)

Interesting post!

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