Let's carve out these hearts of black and blue.

Synthaea By Synthaea, 17th Nov 2010 | Follow this author | RSS Feed | Short URL http://nut.bz/1vf0tbqs/
Posted in Wikinut>Writing>Poetry

I was seized by a sudden flood of concepts and had to grab the nearest bit of scrap paper. The notes grew of their own accord into a rather interesting structure. It's lovely when months of writer's block are interspersed with occasional surges of inspiration. :)
A bit of almost-Evanescence snuck into the third stanza.

Ladies and gentleman, welcome to The Open Heart Surgery. A few introductory words...

I put my heart in the hands of a fool, but it's not like he wasn't asking for it.
~
I find it ironic that you were once the reason I stopped crying every day; now you're the only reason I do.
~
Since the cleft, I've embraced all and you've embraced nothing. {Coping mechanisms.}

Wounds

Time heals all, including my heart's contusions, my mind's abrasions
And my soul's lacerations. But I wish it would hurry the hell up.
I assumed I'd garner only one permanent scar this year; the wound that you healed.
You were my sentient journal, my lifeline, my male counterpart, my completion
And are still seen and felt in all things. The filter over my world.
~
You'd think, sixty-five days later, I'd be accustomed to the lack of you. {But my mind is stained.}

Tired

I expect my readers grow weary of such poetry;
My sweet friends are likely exhausted by such confidences
And I'm sorry for burdening you all so.
Believe me, I tire of it too.
~
I wish I was afraid to dream
To sleep, sleep forever. {"Cloud Nine".}

Unshakable

I so desperately want to be rid of this.
It taints all that I see and touch
Clouds all that I think and feel.
~
No matter how many words I write
Songs I sing, formulae I immerse myself in
This seems unshakable; broken, yet unbreakable. {Let me never fall again.}

Dark

Now I see dark humour in 'falling in love'. The further you fall, the harder you hit the ground.
And one often falls for those who lift one up.
~
A sad smile for the happy couples. Not long now, I think synically.
Fleeting, lust-mingled infatuation holds a sickly sweet allure.
For I am deeply wary, of a new kind of fear. Love.
Irrational, perhaps. But is that not love by definition? {Fighting fire with fire.}

Volatile

Alright, now for some rationality.
~
If one can fall in love so effortlessly; confess deep, unsurpassable adoration;
Build one's life around another in devotion, assure incapability of hurting them;
Promise them eternity, and truly believe it themselves;
Then relentlessly break it all into bitterness - loathing - nothing
Is placing faith in love not ridiculously illogical? {We are such volatile, fragile creatures.}

Acid

He and I don't speak anymore.
After he left the relationship, I eventually knew that I had to leave the friendship.
I miss him achingly, and hope that one day we'll be on good terms.
Reading old emails, I sink back into the bliss; smiling, laughing aloud
For one perfect moment, I am in love again... And then I remember.
It washes over me like caustic acid. {An impossibly corrosive burn.}

Tags

Abrasion, Accustomed, Achingly, Acid, Adoration, Afraid, Again, All, Allure, Asking, Assumed, Assure, Battered, Believe, Bitterness, Bliss, Broken, Bruised, Burdening, Burn, Caustic, Cleft, Cloud Nine, Clouds, Completion, Confidences, Contusion, Coping, Coping Mechanisms, Corrosive, Counterpart, Couple, Creatures, Crying, Cynical, Dark, Definition, Desperately, Devotion, Dream, Emails, Embraced, Emotional, Eternity, Evanescence, Exhausted, Faith, Fall, Falling In Love, Fear, Feelings, Fighting, Filter, Fire, Fleeting, Fool, Forever, Formulae, Fragile, Friends, Friendship, Garner, Hands, Happy, Heal, Heart, Hell, Humour, Hurry, Hurt, Illogical, Immerse, Impossibly, Infatuation, Ironic, Irrational, Journal, Laceration, Lack, Laughing, Lifeline, Loathing, Love, Lust, Male, Mechanisms, Mind, Miss, Moment, Nicola Treadwell, Nothing, Old, Open Heart Surgery, Pain, Perfect, Permanent, Poem, Poems, Poet, Poetry, Promise, Rationality, Readers, Reading, Reason, Relationships, Relentless, Remember, Rid, Ridiculous, Romance, Sad, Scar, See, Sentient, Sickly, Sink, Sleep, Smile, Smiling, Songs, Sorry, Soul, Speak, Stained, Suffering, Sweet, Synthaea, Taint, Terms, Think, Think Feel, Time, Time Heals All, Tired, Touch, Unbreakable, Unshakable, Volatile, Want, Wary, Washes, Weary, Wish, Words, Wound, Wounds, Write, Year, You

Meet the author

author avatar Synthaea
I'm quite a bizarre teenager. Intellect and eccentricity enthrall me. I am torn between science and literature, unsure which I wish my future to rest with.

Writing is my constant, and ensures my sanity (or perhaps lack thereof).
If you'd like to c...(more)

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Comments

author avatar Synthaea
17th Nov 2010 (#)

If you have read this, please leave me a comment :D I am really curious as to what people think of this one... also, if you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask. :)

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author avatar wonder
18th Nov 2010 (#)

Love is many faceted and can extract or squeeze all dreams and emotions.A unique way you have explored this.

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author avatar Synthaea
18th Nov 2010 (#)

That is very true. Thank you, wonder. :)

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author avatar Retired
18th Nov 2010 (#)

lovely page, thanks for sharing it.

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author avatar LOVERME
18th Nov 2010 (#)

just gr8888888888

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author avatar Synthaea
18th Nov 2010 (#)

Thanks very much, for reading it and your praise.

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author avatar grey
19th Nov 2010 (#)

i've never been in love. but you just told me how...hmm...unpleasant it could be. nevertheless, i'd still click 'like'.:) (figurative. can't click it really. lest my friends find me here. *sigh*)
what's with 'synically'? a personal kind of cynicism?;D

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author avatar Synthaea
20th Nov 2010 (#)

Love is beautiful as well as terrible. This was just me having a bit of a... lament. ^^
Despite the pain, I still think it's "better to have loved and lost than never loved at all". Failed relationships are excellent teachers, about yourself especially.
I'm glad you would click 'like' ;D means a lot, really. But I understand if you value keeping your Wikinut identity secret. :)
'Synically'... well yes, somewhat :P I am known to many as 'Syn', and a select few (including the subject of this poem, actually) would sometimes take certain words and transform them into 'synsomething's... 'synce', 'syntricate', 'syncerely', 'syndecent', 'synsational', 'syntastic', the list goes on ;D

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author avatar Denise O
23rd Nov 2010 (#)

I have loved, been hurt,dust my pants off and done it again.
I wish we didn't have to go through the bad, too get to the good.
The good thing is, after a few downs...
I have found my true love and he has been for the last 20+ years.
Nice poem. I felt you and I wanted to yell...
delete those darn poems young lady!
The same I would do with my 25 yr old daughter.
Thank you for sharing.:)

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author avatar christopheranton
24th Nov 2010 (#)

I hope your heart heals soon.
Lovely poem.
Thanks for sharing.

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author avatar Synthaea
24th Nov 2010 (#)

Haha Denise, you're absolutely right. It's a pain that generally rewards in the end, and always comes to pass, so there's no use lamenting endlessly. I guess when the emotions build up and I can't rid myself of them, poetry is my release of choice. I'm really happy you've found the one for you, and glad you can empathise. Thank you for commenting. :)

Thanks very much, Christopher; I think it's well on its way. :)

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author avatar aden kendroemen
4th Dec 2010 (#)

“But my mind is stained”, what a visceral representation you have created here. The unfortunate nature of the pain we may sometimes suffer is obvious. What is not always so obvious, is the understanding of ourselves, and the world around us gained in this area. It leads me to believe our emotions should not be labeled as either good or bad, only different. A deeper level of understanding attained in what is perceived as negative. This is not to say that we should seek pain, merely to suggest that it should not be avoided. As you have said before dear, to avoid ( insert whatever causes you pain here) is no way to live. If we are truly alive, we feel deeply and passionately. To set up roadblocks on what we can and cannot feel, is to inevitably disengage from living altogether. Thank you Miss Muse for your colorful thoughts, that strike the notes of the soul.

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author avatar Retired
29th Dec 2010 (#)

nice work.

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author avatar Artur Victoria
30th Jan 2011 (#)

Excellent!

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author avatar LOVERME
11th Mar 2011 (#)

where have u gone frnd

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author avatar Sinbad the SailorMan
19th Aug 2011 (#)

Synthaea, You made me laugh out loud in the second line second sentence. This is very publishable. Is it ? If not, do summit it to some of the Lady Magazines its bound to get published.

I loved it totally, but would give a little thought to the the ending line's definition Statement "Impossibly" maybe endless or eternally or infectiousness or the like. {An impossibly corrosive burn.}
It is good to write it out and then let it Go away with you Oh Evil lust breaker you never knew my love Oh you fool. That's what I tell these thoughts After a year or two of dwelling upon them. All things shall pass with time.

Also give great consideration to Your tags you have way to many use only the very best of them and cut their numbers down too about ten of the best descriptors found with in the poem its self Too many tags is harmful here. especially with Poetry writes. you want only precise tags. Love Loss should be one of them. Good luck this was a great write. Donnie/ Sinbad the Sailor Man

Revising your tags should bring new traffic to this write.

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author avatar LOVERME
6th Nov 2017 (#)

I have never ever heard from you again but teenager then in my memory for ever you shall remain you brought me to such fame coz you had nothing to gain...
if ever you come across this comment don't lament twas you who were god sent today over thousands have me read and daily since 2010 many read me 300 to 500 now hope my love young gal surpasses my life I am now on my way out of human strife some day one day when your novella is being awarded a NOBEL send a flying kiss towards me too our friendship was for just a breezy while but was one of style cause you made my while I reproduce to you your own ode may be you will decipher the code As you get a Nobel look up towards heaven a tear of joy may fall your way.... Loveme will smile that day...thank you Ferns again...
~ Ode to Loverme ~

Loverme, O loverme,
A pioneer in off-the-cuff poetry,
Impulsive, free form and carefree,
Yet wise and clever, shrouded in mystery,
A myriad of words at the fingertips of thee,
Poems interspersed with glorious imagery,
A golden apple on this Wikinut tree.
Thank you, loverme
loverme
loverme

For those of you who don't know, Loverme is a very talented poet who writes on Wikinut. She (or perhaps he?) is also unfailingly sweet and not only publishes new works all the time, but constantly comments on others' writes with thoughts and praise. Amazingly, Loverme only joined Wikinut two months ago, but has already published 111 pages, earned 2481 nut points and gained 132 followers (since I last checked). Loverme may come across as a bit bizarre initially, but rest assured she/he is lovely, and a great writer too.
2010 SYNTHEA or syn as she would love to say

Thank you, loverme, for all your magnificence :)

where in the dark dungeons
of time
have thee gone
my long lost friend
syn syn syn?

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author avatar LOVERME
6th Nov 2017 (#)

Synthea, Syn A Tribute... 2010 Now 2017......

I have never ever heard from you again
but teenager then,
in my memory for ever you shall remain
you brought me to such fame
coz you had nothing to gain...
if ever you come across this comment
don't lament ‘twas you who were God sent

today over thousands have me read
and daily since 2010 many read me
300 to 500

now hope my lovely young gal
surpasses my life
I am now on my way out of human strife
some day
one day when your Novella is being awarded
a NOBEL
send a flying kiss towards me too
our friendship was for just a breezy while
but was one of style
cause you made my while

I reproduce to you, your own Ode
may be you will decipher the code
As you get a Nobel
look up towards heaven
a tear of joy may fall your way....
Loveme will smile that day...
Thank you Ferns again for showing me this way!

~ Ode to Loverme ~ By Synthea or Syn...a teenager in 2010
Loverme, O loverme,
A pioneer in off-the-cuff poetry,
Impulsive, free form and carefree,
Yet wise and clever, shrouded in mystery,
A myriad of words at the fingertips of thee,
Poems interspersed with glorious imagery,
A golden apple on this Wikinut tree.
Thank you, loverme
Loverme
Loverme
Syn.....2010
Note
For those of you who don't know, Loverme is a very talented poet who writes on Wikinut. She (or perhaps he?) is also unfailingly sweet and not only publishes new works all the time, but constantly comments on others' writes with thoughts and praise. Amazingly, Loverme only joined Wikinut two months ago, but has already published 111 pages, earned 2481 nut points and gained 132 followers (since I last checked). Loverme may come across as a bit bizarre initially, but rest assured she/he is lovely and a great writer too.
2010 SYNTHEA or Syn as she would love to say
My current Stats are well Blushing...Loverme

2010 SYNTHEA or Syn as she would love to say

Thank you, loverme, for all your magnificence :)

Where in the dark dungeons
of time
have thee gone
my long lost friend
Syn, Syn, Syn...Loverme....

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