Life Begins After 50

aking1614 By aking1614, 21st Oct 2014 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Writing>Columns & Opinions

It's sometimes hard to make a move, even one you know is best for you, when others don't understand. I made a decision to divorce after 28 years of marriage. Family, friends and church members questioned my decision, my faith, even my sanity. All I know is that I am finally at peace and enjoying life, finally at age 51.

When No One Understands

It’s amazing how God begins to open doors of opportunity once we learn to be still and listen to His voice. I recently made a life-changing decision that was very unpopular with those around me, to say the least. I stepped out on faith because I felt that it was what the Spirit was directing me to do. I made a decision and for the first time in, I can't even tell you how long, I was at peace. I was no longer crying every day, no longer lying awake at night. Despite attempts from nearly everyone I know to talk me out of it, I made this decision based on what was in my heart and my own spirit.

Since then, I have shed nearly 25 pounds and am taking better control of my health. You see, I was a stress eater and boy, did I have stress! I changed jobs, too, so I could get back to doing what I enjoy most within my chosen career. I began going out (alone) and wound up making some new friends.

My Vision Board

I made a vision board about six months ago at a women’s fellowship event at my church. It outlines some of my goals going forward. I envisioned myself reclaiming my home; an end to the physical and emotional clutter that was always present. My home was always meant to be my sanctuary and refuge from the stress of the outside world, not a source of more stress. I pasted on words and photos representing my wish to get strong and fit, to travel abroad, to sing and act on stage. I attached large banners proclaiming “Make Your Voice Heard”, “Play To Your Strengths” and “Tapping Her Potential”.

I didn't quite finish during the time allotted, but brought the board home. Almost as an afterthought, I started going through some of the magazines on my coffee table. I found the most awesome phrases to complete my board. The first one said, “Why It’s Worth It”. The second, “You TEACH people how to treat you”. How appropriate for my life thus far.

I may sometimes complain about situations I’ve been in, my pain and struggles. But without them, I wouldn’t be the BA50 (Better after 50) I am today. Every moment was worth it and everything I am currently dealing with at present is worth it. In the end, I emerge strong and confident.

How many years did it take me to build up even an ounce of self-esteem and self-worth? How long did I place the needs of others above my own? How long did I allow myself to be a doormat for family, friends, bosses, church members and the world at large? By never standing up for myself, never realizing that I deserved better treatment, never looking out for my own best interest, I did indeed teach others that it was perfectly okay to take me for granted, to be inconsiderate of my time and talents and to ignore my needs.

Taking A Stand, Making A Move

No more! I'm cleaning house and taking inventory. I have made great strides and I have learned to listen to my own heart after letting God speak to it. I went to an audition back in the spring of this year for a local gospel music event. It’s a pretty big deal around here and this was the 11th year it has been presented in the heart of downtown Columbus. I was given a spot to do one song – it’s a start. And to put the icing on the cake or the gravy on the potatoes (whatever your preference) one of the judges at the audition was a local playwright and director who was scouting singing talent for her Gospel stage play which she planned to take to Washing D.C. for the annual Black Theatre Festival. I was offered (and accepted, I'm no fool) a role in the play as well.

So after a little housekeeping and obedience on my part, letting go of people and fears that were hindering me, doors are beginning to open for me to do some of the things I’ve always dreamed of. The things which I had put on the back burner for so long because I was too busy doing what others expected me to do. I am scheduled to do two poetry reading in a few weeks time. And I am laying the groundwork to have my poetry book reviewed and endorsed by Kirkus.

It’s all very surreal at the moment. I guess it’s true – Life Begins After 50!

©2014 – Andrea J. King

Tags

Cleaning House, Clutter, Emotional Eating, Inventory, Maturity, Self-Confidence, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Taking Stock

Meet the author

author avatar aking1614
I am an engineer by trade, but a poet and songstress at heart. I started writing occasional articles online about five years ago, but poetry is still my first love.

find me on twitter@ashanpoetry

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Comments

author avatar Sivaramakrishnan A
21st Oct 2014 (#)

Wish you well. In life one should know when to let go and to take decisions than depend on others who can never know what we want - siva

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author avatar C.D. Moore
21st Oct 2014 (#)

Congratulations on having the courage to follow your heart. Your sharing will encourage others to do the same.

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author avatar GV Rama Rao
21st Oct 2014 (#)

Charity begins at home. If you don't look after yourself no one else will. I'm glad you're now on the right track.

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author avatar GV Rama Rao
21st Oct 2014 (#)

Charity begins at home. If you don't look after yourself no one else will. I'm glad you're now on the right track.

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author avatar Stella Mitchell
24th Oct 2014 (#)

Sorry for my late reply my friend ..
You didn't step out of faith aking ..
You stepped into it ...
God does not want us living in constant misery and defeat at the mercy of others , and some decisions are extremely hard to make ...but you made one , and look at all the good doors that have opened for you .
May you experience the Lord's peace and joy in your heart from this day forward .
God bless you Stella ><

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author avatar aking1614
25th Oct 2014 (#)

Stella, thank you. It was a much needed change and I know it will work out for my good.

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