More Boys, Boys, Boys

Carol RoachStarred Page By Carol Roach, 8th Feb 2015 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Writing>Personal Experiences

The pain of teenage love is not a force to be reckoned with. This article is the sequel to the article "Boys, Boys, Boys" written in my book, "Picking Up the Pieces: A Woman's Journey


In the previous article Boys, Boys, Boys I never had luck with boys as a teenager though I wanted one badly. Now let me tell you what happened with the two boys that did want me and how I handled it with the wisdom that is only bestowed upon a 14-year-old girl!


Bernie was the brother of Brenda, who was the first girl from Nova Scotia that I had befriended after Renata had left the school. Bernie was just Bernie to me. He was Brenda's older brother and although I knew that he liked me in that special way I did not like him back, at least not that way. I guess I thought of him as the big brother I never had. He was a year older than Brenda and I who were 12 years old at the time. He was 13 and very mature for his years. Since he was Brenda's brother I instinctively knew that if I had a crush on him I would face public ridicule from Brenda who could not fathom anyone being crazy over her "stupid brother". I decided to just leave well enough alone.

Later, more of Brenda's family from Nova Scotia moved to Montreal and I was introduced to her cousins. Phillip was the same age as Brenda and a very attractive boy at that. He was the total opposite of Bernie, he was good looking, outgoing, cheeky, and girl crazy. However he was not the smartest kid on the block. Remember, my criteria for choosing a boy was his looks and not much else.

Love notes

It just so happened that Phillip was crazy about me! At first I was all excited. Finally a boy that I liked liked me back. Could this possibly be happening to me? Eventually it got to be more than I could handle. Phillip was actively pursuing me. He was sending love notes to me everyday in school; delivered by none other than Brenda herself. This behavior from Brenda was far different than her reaction would have been to having me date her brother. She was actually enjoying this drama as it was being played out.

I read the letters, noted all the spelling errors and realized that Phillip, as good-looking as he was, was falling short of my dreams. I couldn't handle the attention either. I was just not ready for it. I was really too immature to date. And I was feeling uncomfortable.

Also, I lost my friend Bernie over it. When Bernie saw what was going on between Phillip and I he backed away.

Furthermore, he has never spoken to me since. Talk about keeping grudges!

I finally told Brenda to tell Phillip that I was just not interested, as I liked Bernie. However, it was too late. Bernie would have nothing to do with me. I cared about losing Bernie's friendship but I didn't care about dating him. I never wanted to anyhow.

Lavenia and Denseley

The other boy that liked me was Densley. He was a boy that had just recently arrived from the island of Guyana. I didn't know him all that much and was not really interested in knowing him except for the fact that Renata's little cousin Lavenia did. She was crazy over him. She was 12, I was 14, and Densley was 15.

Now Lavenia was trying hard to win Densley's attention. She would drag me to their meeting spot because although she was interested in him, she still felt she needed a chaperone. I don't blame her because Densley was very experienced in the affairs of the heart - or was it just plain sex neither of us knew for sure.

When we were all together Densley loved to clown around with me. He seemed to be more interested in me than Lavenia. I had to remind him constantly that Lavenia was there and we should be including her into our conversations and antics.

When we were all together Densley loved to clown around with me. He seemed to be more interested in me than Lavenia. I had to remind him constantly that Lavenia was there and we should be including her into our conversations and antics.

Yet, I still did not figure out that he was interested in me. Even though I had Philip interested in me, prior to that one experience of actually having a boy interested in me, it was not enough to make see myself as a love interest for any boy. It would take me reaching 15 years old before that happened and that is "a whole nother story" as my deceased writer, friend, Loren Moore would say.

Hated my first French kiss

To get back to story at hand, the last time I saw Densley as a teenager, was when he came by my house just minutes before I had to go in for the night. He was by himself and I was alone as well. Lavenia had already gone home for the night. I did not know why he came by. I never saw him without Lavenia. He took it upon himself to see me.
I wanted to go upstairs and into the house at that very moment but he persisted that he had something very important that he had to discuss with me. There seemed to be no way that I could get out of it.

Instead of talking he took me by surprise and grabbed my face and forced a French kiss on me! How disgusting, I had never been kissed by a boy before and this had to be the grossest thing that I had ever felt. The taste of his saliva literally repulsed me. On the other hand, Densley was love struck while I was sickened. I was so disgusted that I told him I never wanted to see him again with or without Lavenia and the next day I told her the same thing.


As adults, Lavenia, and I renewed our friendship with Densley. We talked about those times and how foolish we all had had been. Apparently where he grew up in Guyana, kids of 12 and 13 were already having sex. Being new to Canada he did not realize that the culture was very different. At 14 years old I was not anywhere ready to have sex. I could not even handle my first French kiss!

Although that experience had haunted me for years to come, of course it did not prevent me from wanting boys, boys, boys. Only this time I played it safe, I waited until I was 15 years old before I would dare to chase after another boy again!

All pictures are public domain
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First Kiss, Teenage Boys, Teenage Girls, Teenage Love

Meet the author

author avatar Carol Roach
Retired therapist and author of two books, freelance writer, newsletter editor, and blogger. I write, health, mental health, women's issues, animal , celebrity, history, and SEO articles.

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author avatar Nancy Czerwinski
9th Feb 2015 (#)

Thanks for sharing and I truly enjoyed it. I think we've all got memories of boys way back when.

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author avatar Sivaramakrishnan A
9th Feb 2015 (#)

Interesting read Carol. When I was young in India, it was a conservative environment where boys and girls were not seen together, so we were very discreet! siva

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author avatar GV Rama Rao
9th Feb 2015 (#)

A fascinating read. It's the irony of life; we want something which we cannot get and ignore those who want us. I too had a crush on a girl as a teenager, but she never responded to my overtures.

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