My Open Letter to Justin Bieber

L. R. Laverde-Hansen By L. R. Laverde-Hansen, 27th Jan 2014 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Writing>Humor

This open letter tries to give a few pieces of advice to the troubled pop star, Justin Bieber.

To Justin Bieber

Dear 'Biebs,'

Bet it must really suck to be you right now. Getting busted for drag racing; being forced to wear a cutesy red prison jumpsuit; knowing that over 100,000 people signed a petition asking the White House to deport you back to Canada; watching your ex, Selena Gomez, mature into an accomplished performer (doing even better without you)--yeah, all that's gotta suck super salmon.

It's enough to make you wanna go off the deep end--again. But wait a minute, little dude. You're nineteen-years old--nineteen-years old, for crying out loud! How many people on this earth have reached your level of fame and become such a unique (i.e., quirky) touchstone of popular culture? Not many. But just because you've done so much in such a brief stretch of time, doesn't mean you've peaked. It certainly doesn't mean it's time to check out. The best is always yet to come.

Ok J-Biebz, here's a few tips how you can turn around your career--er life--and get back being the big star you are (You can send me that "thank you" check later. ).

Some tips for J-Biebz

1) Own up to everything you've done, aka grow up - Just as you've been living on the wealth and fame you earned as a pop star, so too, you gotta accept responsibility when your actions are not legal, let alone right. Now is a good time to do it because you are young and all outstanding warrants are for first offenses. You probably will get some serious probation. You may be forced to enter rehab. But if you own up in court, you will probably avoid jail time, and you will not have a serious criminal record.

Then you got to make a statement about it. Tell the world you're sorry for what you've done, that you will be making amends (i.e., seeking treatment), and that you ask everyone to respect your privacy "at this difficult time." Though the paparazzi won't stop, at least you'll get the respect of many of the parents of your fans (you know, the people who actually buy the things your fans enjoy).

2) Get help (for real) - Buddy, you're actually going through a meltdown. Maybe it's a real substance abuse problem, or just a symptom of something else. Either way, it's important you deal with it, at least through a trained, no bs counselor. Right now, you don't need no more handlers, more people paid to tell you how great you are and how great everything is. Don't be another celebrity tragedy waiting to happen. Have somebody who can deal with you at your worst. This would be a mature step that would begin to get you on track.

3) Talk to your loved ones--and listen to them - You're still young enough to consult with your folks, close relatives or friends who knew you when. Although it's you and no one else who has to make the big decisions, it's always a good idea to consult with people with more experience who care about you. Just make sure you have the right type of family (poor Lindsay Lohan can't talk to her parents). But the right advice is what you need.

4) See the hidden opportunity, aka "blessing in disguise" in all of this - We all know that our problems test us, but they also make us stronger, deeper, more interesting as people. They are an essential part of human growth, and for an artist, there is no better catalyst to create better art.

Try to associate with real artists of the game. Instead of hanging with a bunch of wannabee thugs, keep working with real artists in music and leaders in general. They can steer you the right way (see what your ex is doing for a clearer example).

Right now, you think it's all bad now, but one day you will look back on and marvel at how much it molded you (assuming you're not dead soon). Life is always a great opportunity to experience, to grow and to learn.

In Closing

Biebs, you can whine, "why is me," or you can relish the chance to move to the bigger leagues of life. The choice is yours.

Sincerely,

L. R. Laverde-Hansen
(not a fan, but a concerned citizen)

Tags

Humor, Justin Bieber, Pop Songs, Pop Stars, Satire, Selena Gomez

Meet the author

author avatar L. R. Laverde-Hansen
Poet, playwright, commentator. I write wherever I can. Currently I reside in the City of New York.

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Comments

author avatar Lady Aiyanna
1st Feb 2014 (#)

He has a felony questioning taking place in NYC as we speak for two cross country charges including smell of Pot in plane. He is only 19.

http://www.tmz.com/2014/01/31/justin-bieber-flagged-u-s-customs-marijuana-weed/#comments-fullwrapper

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author avatar L. R. Laverde-Hansen
1st Feb 2014 (#)

Well, we'll see.

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author avatar Lady Aiyanna
2nd Feb 2014 (#)

Here is the reward after 5 hours of questioning.
http://www.tmz.com/2014/02/01/justin-bieber-stripper-biting-boob-photo-khalil/#comments-fullwrapper

Well his parenting upbringing is to be blamed for the way he is.

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author avatar Phyl Campbell
1st Feb 2014 (#)

LR -- I love the sentiment behind this. It is hard for people to remember when Justin Beiber was a sweet faced young man who was so excited to be on the Ellen show -- was back when his youtube video went viral. Those of us a little less successful, a little older and hopefully a little wiser, we've seen this before -- whether the pop idol was Hansen or Back Street Boys or Eminem or 98 degrees or O-Town or Michael Jackson or Elvis Presley. We may be defined by the famous songs of from when we were in HS, but those who stand the test of time can't all be bad boys! And so many bad boys die too young as a result of these epic fail choices.
I liked the way you neither adored nor condemned -- you just said it like it was, and not that JB is in a position to listen right now, but if he was, he might realize just how sage your advice is.

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author avatar L. R. Laverde-Hansen
1st Feb 2014 (#)

Thank you, Phyl. I'm so glad you appreciated what I said there. I have no illusions as to my influence as a writer (now anyway), but I felt it had to be said.

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author avatar Lady Aiyanna
2nd Feb 2014 (#)

Its more than their songs, its also their lives that make them. If their lives are untoward and fans see it, they leave but if proven they are victims of bad press, they come back with greater intensity.

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author avatar Mark Gordon Brown
1st Feb 2014 (#)

Too much fame, too much money, at a young age, was a recipe for disaster. However I do think some triggers were set in place too as when he first came out and before he started acting like a little jerk people made fun of him, it got worse from there.

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author avatar L. R. Laverde-Hansen
1st Feb 2014 (#)

You're right, Mark. This is an influence on his behavior. Still, M. Bieber has a choice how to live his life. We all do.

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author avatar Fern Mc Costigan
1st Feb 2014 (#)

Hope he reads it, he nededs the good advice this lads is losing it!

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author avatar L. R. Laverde-Hansen
1st Feb 2014 (#)

Thanks, Fern. He should listen to good advice.

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author avatar L. R. Laverde-Hansen
1st Feb 2014 (#)

Excellent comments from all! We shall see what M. Bieber does with his life.

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author avatar Stella Mitchell
1st Feb 2014 (#)

fame has a way of making people think they are invincible , but it also puts the famous one in the spotlight and the hot seat , all difficult situations for one who has shot to stardom at such a young age .
I hope someone is able to speak wise advice , as you have written L.R. into M.Beiber's life before he shipwrecks it altogether .
Bless you
Stella

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author avatar L. R. Laverde-Hansen
2nd Feb 2014 (#)

Thank you, Stella. I was being a little cheeky with his woes, but he really has the world at his feet. If he truly believes in the One who made the world, will find the peace he needs.

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