No more videography work, thank you. Now what is it I'm going to do now?

Marzeus von Hemelen By Marzeus von Hemelen, 11th Oct 2015 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Writing>Diaries

Sometimes it's just time to decide what it is you really do, and what it is you don't anymore. Focus, that's the name of the game. Or is it?

Sore back

Some ways of sitting hurt my back. I know the chair in the living room by the computer is one of those; if I sit down for ten minutes on it, I'll be sure to get up from there with dislocated vertebrae or something.

Not sure why, but since yesterday, I have a very sore back. Must have pulled something.

The call

While Mother and I eat and talk in the West Wing after our moviemaking session, the phone rings. Mother answers. It's Uncle Hazel. He's been looking for me ever since we were in The Land Of The West. I know what's coming now.

Video and I

Now, let me explain my doings and goings. Years ago, instead of paying to send me to university, my Father used the money to buy me video equipment. If you know something about video equipment, you'll know that 15, 20 years ago, things weren't the cheap digital computer plug-in thingies they are now. Professional video equipment cost an absolute fortune, and people who had it and could do real good work with it was scarce.

Now, the reason I bought it was because I wanted to make my own movies and television programs with it. But, pretty soon everybody wanted me to do videography work for them, from making them wedding videos to video presentations and concert videos and music videos and instructional videos and whatnot. Not long before it even snowballed into doing television commercials and inserts and short programs that went onto TV where billions of people saw it. Was nice for the first bunch of times to see something I made on TV.

I did it for a while, but soon realized it just takes so much time to make something really good and edit it until it's really professional, and people are reluctant to pay decent amounts, and it wasn't long before I felt overall unfulfilled working like a slave for people's chump change. Not that I regret any particular adventure I had shooting in places and traveling around the country like I never would have otherwise done; all in all, some of it was a great adventure.

But, something was missing. It was the time to express my creative side with the creative ideas I had myself. And, that's what I wanted in the first place. All I see now is myself getting older and having less time to do the things I wanted to do.

So, since last year, I've been telling people I'm not taking on any more videography jobs for a while. Some took it very personal and thought I was mad at them or something. It's hard to tell people "Sorry, I won't be doing business with you anymore because I feel unfulfilled". So I didn't tell them that fortunately. I just said I have enough on my plate as is. Which is the truth, whatwith doing a children's movie with Mother, Timebotics as my own project, and all the time uploading online shows and videos to monetize with all the little advertising cents here and there programs.

Not worth the money

Anyway, Mother hands me the phone to talk to Uncle Hazel. We chat a bit and then he says he wants me to do something for him again. Now I've done a lot for him in the past; we even travelled internationally to turn an entire album of his songs into music videos. It was a great adventure but the editing was murder. Not to mention, since he signed with his current label, they are supposed to pay me an 8 % royalty but so far only after enquiring regularly for about 2 years afterwards, they paid me a measly R400. So, they made only over R4,000 with the whole thing? Are they kidding me? I know they didn't.

"Is it video work?"

"Yes", he says.

"I'm afraid I don't do videography work anymore. I have no more time for that. I pursue other interests now. But let's hear what it was you needed."

He then proceeds to tell me a whole list of work. From a commercial to a commercial for a travel agent to a music video to one or two television programs of him preaching.

And, for all that, he will pay me R1,000. Eish. They left a message before on Mother's phone that they wanted to come see me for a "paid appointment", since I hinted about two years ago the last time they were here to overload me with work, that I expect to see some money when they do that. I knew that when they said "paid appointment" instead of naming the amount, that I shouldn't expect much. But I didn't know it was so low it's silly.

So is drama something I want to include in my life?

Late this afternoon, Mother calls me on the phone while I'm working in Studio A. She wants me to come to the West Wing.

"What for?", I ask.

"It's about drama", she says.

"I have enough drama in my life", I tell her. But I go anyway.

It seems Mother has been reading up on a drama course they are starting at the university. We check the dates and times, and lo and behold, it's starting tonight. In an hour and fifteen minutes to be precise.

Ok, now I'm floored. First of all, do I want to take a drama course now? I took one some years ago and it was fun, but I couldn't finish it because of videography jobs I had to do on the days of the finals.

Now, I have another chance again to be part of a drama class. Aside from having fun, I could meet other people and spot some gems who could make excellent actors in my movies.

But I'm so, soooooo sleepy, and my back still hurts a lot, it's uncomfortable to move. Should I go start a drama course in this state?

It's costing R1,700, and it's every Tuesday evening for two hours, for 16 weeks.

The 16 weeks thing makes me wonder a bit. I know myself; I'll get bored with it after the second, third or fourth class. Still, perhaps I might enjoy it more than I think. Hopefully I'll meet more creative people, something which I want to surround myself with.

But maybe the people will be stupid. I remember last time it was just a bunch of young people like myself, but instead of being creative and intelligent, they just wanted to take a break from the class about every five minutes so they can go smoke outside. All the chicks smoked, so there wasn't anybody for me to look out for.

And, since the teacher was a successful soap actress, many girls in the class acted all jealous and just wanted to spread all the bad rumours about the teacher being a chain smoker and not all that wonderful etc. So darn what; she's sharing her knowledge so let's learn! Or so was my thinking anyway.

And, to top it off, some girl desperately clung to me that time and got demanding and started ruining that class, while another guy also clung to me, though he wasn't bad and I liked his company, the chick and him started getting difficult with each other because the chick just wanted to be alone with me probably because she wanted some romance fantasy to happen or something. It's no fun when two people are obsessed with you and always follow you around, but they can't get along with each other.

She even messaged me on the phone for six months to a year afterwards, even though I never responded. Poor thing must really have had a thing for me.

As for the class itself, I did enjoy it. But I can't say I enjoyed the homework. I'm now a lot busier than back then, so I know I won't have too much time for any homework. But if it can be just the classes, that can work.

So, maybe I want to go, but I'm just so pressured for time now. Should I enroll? Can I still enroll?

To go or not to go, that is the question

Father comes home and gives Mom and I pizza. He says if I want to go, he'll give me pain pills for my back and I must go immediately.

So I leave the house to go switch everything off in Studio A. But, on my way there, it doesn't feel right. I'm still thinking that perhaps I should go, but on the other hand, ... I don't know.

Once inside the studio and seeing all the work I was busy with, I want to continue that rather and not get all swept up in a rash decision about taking a course. It's just all too quick.

Then Father calls me on the phone. Apparently they're sitting in the car, waiting for me. Poor things :)

It seems that though last we talked the plan was that I would drive alone, Mother did offer that Father and her will take me. But Father didn't want to, so I assumed he wouldn't, and if I still wanted to go I'd just go alone. But it seems meanwhile Mother convinced him, and now they're waiting for me, but I didn't even go get dressed. I thank them for sitting in the car waiting for me, but I suggest they now get out.

Well, I didn't go to the first class tonight, but just maaaaaaaaaaaaaybe I still might enroll. I just can't decide. Why can't I decide? It's not such a big decision, is it? I just don't want to pay that money and then stop going after the first or second time, for whatever reason.

I guess I'll think about it some more. Can't believe I'm so indecisive about it. Guess it's because it's not something I really need, but which still could be nice and learnsome.

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Career, Dvd, Film, Filmmaking, Video, Video Camera, Videography

Meet the author

author avatar Marzeus von Hemelen
I like eggs for breakfast. I live on top of a hill inside a beautiful but old dwelling complex. I like to take life in through my senses and then give feedback through my writing.

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author avatar Fern Mc Costigan
12th Oct 2015 (#)

Awesome post, like reading your style is very innovative!

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