Trying not to be too analytic in the Lyric of a Poem

shallimarRoseStarred Page By shallimarRose, 30th May 2012 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Writing>Poetry

a piece about a poet that drinks away her time while trying to make some sense of the carrying on going on in the pub around her..

.an·a·lyt·ic (n-ltk) or an·a·lyt·i·cal (--kl)
adj.
1. Of or relating to analysis or analytics.
2. Dividing into elemental parts or basic principles.
3. Reasoning or acting from a perception of the parts and interrelations of a subject:

LYRIC

locked away
in her own mind

sitting silently on the barstool
like a prop

perched
trying not to be analytical
watching encounters
comings and goings
couples around her
conjoined by tequila
in pre sunrise moments

shaken not stirred


shooting jello
like whisky that sours
swapping old stories
and old cars
with a grain of salt

shaken not stirred
in the misty waters
of a tearstained page
silently she notes
the lyric of a poem
the memory
of a slow dance
on saw dusted floors

two step promenades

with two step promenades
clandestine embraces
in the dimly lit corners
hung like a ballad
on a slow long note

that echoes in the night
humming to the tune
of a long forgotten song
that silenced years ago
in the wake of a muse
the death of a sonnet

hung like a balad

perched on the barstool
trying not to be analytical
watching each move
placed with precision
like the words of a haiku
by a forgotten poet
drinking a glass of regret
in the closing hours
of a smoke filled room

jotting down
each pass
each line
each flirt
trying not to be analytical
in the lyric of a poem

© bj smith
aka shallimarRose

closing time

The poem within the poem

locked away
in her own mind

swapping old stories
and old cars
with a grain of salt

hung like a ballad
on a slow long note

drinking a glass of regret
in the closing hours
of a smoke filled room

bjs

PROPS & LINKS

Images by Google Images

♥ special thanks to the moderation team

they call me Rose (bio)

subtly sensual

Foot in mouth moment

Tags

Bar, Clandestine, Forgotten Poet, Jello Shots Analytical, Lyric, Meetings, Notes, Poem, Sawdust Floors, Shallimarrose, Writing

Meet the author

author avatar shallimarRose
Born Barbara Ann poet/lyricist.
poetry with compassion, rhyme free verse & some romance/mild erotuca..
married w children

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Comments

author avatar Shaunak
5th Jun 2012 (#)

Nice Words, i love the lines
humming to the tune
of a long forgotten song
that silenced years ago
in the wake of a muse
the death of a sonnet
and also
swapping old stories
and old cars. Thanks for sharing
with a grain of salt

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author avatar shallimarRose
5th Jun 2012 (#)

Thank you Shaunak.. I appreciate your comments.. xo...

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author avatar Pradeep Kumar B
5th Jun 2012 (#)

Beautiful poem. Thank you.

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author avatar shallimarRose
5th Jun 2012 (#)

Thank you Pradeep.. I appreciate your coming to read.. xo

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author avatar cnwriter..carolina
5th Jun 2012 (#)

well done SR where is the video??? lol xox

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author avatar shallimarRose
5th Jun 2012 (#)

well this one does not have a video.. I have not tried again yet but when i have time I will..... thanks.. xo

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author avatar tankermone
5th Jun 2012 (#)

Very well done free verse! I especially loved certain lines, like 'conjoined by tequila
in pre sunrise moments', 'hung like a ballad
on a slow long note' and 'drinking a glass of regret'!

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author avatar shallimarRose
5th Jun 2012 (#)

Thank you Tanker.. xo Rose

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author avatar xphantoms
5th Jun 2012 (#)

Great article, and good image, Like it, thank friend

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author avatar shallimarRose
5th Jun 2012 (#)

thank you Phantom.. so glad ou dropped in to read.. sR

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author avatar shallimarRose
5th Jun 2012 (#)

OPPS I FORGOT.. THANKS FOR THE STAR MARK.. XO

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author avatar Carol
5th Jun 2012 (#)

This is lovely, thanks for sharing.

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author avatar shallimarRose
6th Jun 2012 (#)

Thank you Carol.. xo

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author avatar David Reinstein,LCSW
6th Jun 2012 (#)

When it comes to alcohol, "Drink" and "Think" are both rhyming and mutually exclusive.

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author avatar shallimarRose
6th Jun 2012 (#)

Thants so true David thank you.. My father was an alcoholic so I am very much opposed to drinking in excess.. huggs!!

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author avatar BOB the DOG
7th Jun 2012 (#)

Ah! Rose, been on a few lonely bar stools in my time and drunk more than a few drinks of regret. Loved the poem. You are a star!! I love Billy Joel's Piano Man. Apparently written about the customers in a bar in New York where he worked. A great astutely observed piece of writing and so is your poem. Lovely.Xx.

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author avatar shallimarRose
7th Jun 2012 (#)

Thank you Graham... Ill have to go back and listen to BJs song again now... huggs!! Rose

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author avatar Ivyevelyn, R.S.A.
15th Jun 2012 (#)

Rose: I'm back and so pleased to read your beautifully worded free-verse poem. The phraseology is delightful. Thank you.

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author avatar Judy Ellen
16th Jun 2012 (#)

You are amazing Rose!!! This poem is so full of beautiful metaphors and similes!!! You are indeed an expert! I feel like I am in that bar stool myself! I wish I had your talent for poetry!! xoxo

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author avatar shallimarRose
19th Jun 2012 (#)

Thank You Ivy and Judy...
huggs!

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author avatar Delicia Powers
20th Jun 2012 (#)

always so artfully done...lovely!

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