Wife Found Dead

Kingwell By Kingwell, 9th Feb 2013 | Follow this author | RSS Feed | Short URL http://nut.bz/2hfzd7ay/
Posted in Wikinut>Writing>Personal Experiences

On February 23,1995, I returned home to find my 49 year old wife dead.

An Unforgetable Experience

Thursday, February 23, 1995 started like any ordinary day for my wife Sandra and me. There were just the two of us at home now, since our three sons were living in the city about 150 km away. The youngest at 21 was in his fourth year at university and his older brothers were working there. I had taken early retirement and my wife was not working that day. As we worked at the few chores that had to be done, all seemed well and I could never have guess that my life would be turned upside down before the day was over.
I usually went out with a men’s group from our church on Thursday nights and tonight we had decided to go bowling. After dinner, I helped clear away the dishes, kissed my wife who was staying home that night, and set out to meet with my friends. We had a lot fun and joked among ourselves as none of us were really competitive at the sport. It was a good night out and I returned home in a happy mood.
Upon opening the door, I called to my wife in my usual manner, but received no answer. It didn’t really bother me however, at the TV was on and I could see her feet, where she was sitting on the sofa in the living room watching a hockey game, clearly she had fallen asleep. Removing my boots I proceeded to go into the living room, but stopped in my tracts when my wife’s body came into full view. It was clear that something was wrong and my first thought was “she’s dead”. I was of course, in a state of panic but managed to walk over and lay my hand on her forehead. It was icy cold!
I reached for the telephone and called my sister who was married to my wife’s brother, I asked them to come immediately and I believe I said that Sandra was dead. Next I called my clergyman friend who arrived even before my sister and brother-in-law. The Rev. Immediately called our family doctor at his home (I didn’t have the number), and the good doctor was there within minutes. After checking her vital statistics, the doctor extended his hand in condolence. My wife of 28 years was dead at age 49!
The next three hours were like nothing I have ever witnessed before or since, but I could do little but think of our three sons, and how they would react to the sudden and tragic news. My clergyman friend came to my aid again. While at university, my sons had gotten to know the Chaplain there and the clergyman offered to call him and ask him to relay the news to them. That worry was taken off my shoulders for the time being. It was our Family doctor who then called the police and the funeral home. The police arrived shortly and the doctor explained to them what he had found. Next it was my turn to tell my story to the police. They were courteous and understand but very thorough in their investigation.
They finally left, telling me that I would be advised the next day if as autopsy was considered necessary. Both the doctor and the clergyman stayed until the police had left and the body had been removed.
One of my sons called that night to let me know that they had received the news but I advised them to wait until morning before coming home. The next four days, the numerous people who visited the funeral home, The church filled to capacity, every the lunch served later by the Salvation Army all seemed unreal to me to me. The one thing I remembered later was the image of four men standing alone with
heads bowed as they watched a casket being
lowered into the ground and each feeling so
very very much alone.

Tags

Alone, Bowling, Brother, Chaplain, Church, Clergyman, Doctor, Funeral Home, Police, Questioning, Sons, Wife

Meet the author

author avatar Kingwell
I am 75 years old and retired.I like writing short stories, poetry as well other articles of interest.

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Comments

author avatar Mark Gordon Brown
10th Feb 2013 (#)

It must have been a tragic time, and especially as it was without warning.
My sympathies try to reach back through time to you to heal the hole from those times.

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author avatar Kingwell
12th Feb 2013 (#)

Hi Lady Alyanns, The cause of death was a massive heart attack. Thank you for asking.

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author avatar Kingwell
27th Feb 2013 (#)

Thank you Mark.

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author avatar Lady Aiyanna
10th Feb 2013 (#)

It is indeed tragic, what was her causeof death as it is highly unusual forthe lady to just fall down dead.
I am sorry for your loss.....

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author avatar Kingwell
12th Feb 2013 (#)

Hi Lady Alyanna, My wife died of a massive heart attack. Thank you for asking.

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author avatar David Reinstein,LCSW
10th Feb 2013 (#)

Horrible experience... In your avatar photo, it looks like you have some good strings for company. I have many stringed buddies as well. They don't love back like a human, but if I hold and use them well, they respond to my love.
So sorry for your loss.

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author avatar Kingwell
12th Feb 2013 (#)

Hi David, Thank you for your comments but the strings are not mine. They belong to a nine year old girl who does a fabulous job with them. This was at a festival and I was doing some readings. I'm a storyteller but although I love music, I can't play a note. Happy that you enjoy your strings. I'll checkout your pages too.

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author avatar Sivaramakrishnan A
10th Feb 2013 (#)

It takes a moment only to leave this world - I can feel your loss at the way you recall the day. My sympathies - siva

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author avatar Kingwell
12th Feb 2013 (#)

Thank you Siva.

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author avatar Jojay
13th Feb 2013 (#)

Thank you for sharing your story. Few things are worse than the death of a spouse.

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author avatar Kingwell
13th Feb 2013 (#)

Thank you Jojay.

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author avatar Vartika
14th Feb 2013 (#)

No words can ever fill in the void created by our loved ones. Times heals and I hope the pain has lessened for you.

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author avatar Kingwell
14th Feb 2013 (#)

Hi Vartika, Thank you and yes time is the great healer. Nevertheless it is not something that one will forget.

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author avatar Susan Jane
21st Mar 2013 (#)

A sudden death is always a shock. Nothing can bring your loved one back and there's desolation mixed with grief. I feel for your tragedy even though it was some time ago. My own experience with this type of situation was on 16 November 1968. My Dad literally "dropped dead" at a function with a doctor standing nearby. He had a cerebral hemorrage and would have been dead before he hit the floor. There is never a plus when somebody close dies, except that a sudden death comes with no suffering. I hope you have been able to move on to a happy place. We never forget, but the pain eases and wonderful memories last. Bless you.

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author avatar Kingwell
21st Mar 2013 (#)

Thank you Susan Jane, I spent three years alone but have now moved on. I have since remarried but I will never forget that night. I have good memories too of course. Everything happens for a reason. Thank you for your kind words.

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author avatar Songbird B
23rd Mar 2013 (#)

A tragic terrible loss my friend..I am glad that you found happiness again. We are all given a certain amount of time on this earth, so sad that your wife's was so short..Thank you for this very personal share..

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author avatar Kingwell
23rd Mar 2013 (#)

Thank you Songbird and it was a very difficult time.

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author avatar simplyoj
26th Mar 2013 (#)

Thanks for sharing your story to us, glad you have moved on. Keep writing and enjoy life to the fullest.

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