Windows Update ruins evening with guests

Marzeus von Hemelen By Marzeus von Hemelen, 15th Oct 2015 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Writing>General Non-Fiction

Windows. Windows by Microsoft. What can be said about it? A lot, if one wants to focus on the negative. And one really irritating thing, is how Windows will just shut you our of your own computer because it's doing "updates". Never ending updates. That's what Windows is all about.

Getting ready for great evening

Oh, isn't Mother just in a chippery flat spin! She's having guests over tonight. And everything has to be set up perfectly: The wood for the fire, fresh flowers to adorn the room, perfect music, and the list goes on.

Well I'm surprized she can do anything today; she should be extremely tired. For this evening, she wanted to write a DVD of their travels many years ago; Father, her and these guests have been on the same trips and Mother videotaped it. It's been years and they want to remember the good times.

However, have you ever tried teaching a woman of Mother's generation how to make a DVD? It's a mission, I assure you of that.

First, Mother asked me to edit her footage and make her the DVD. I'm like uh... Mother? What you're asking to do is a production that will take months. You want it for your guests' visit? Well then, firstly, there'll be no editing. Secondly, I'll teach you how to write your own DVD's so you can do it, because I simply do not have the time.

Now, what to install her on her computer so she can write her movie files to DVD? (About a year ago, I undertook the large mission of capturing all her DV tapes onto a portable hard drive, so at least now all her footage is digital.)

I have Windows 7, and my Windows 7 has a built-in DVD writing capability right within Windows.

However, Mother, though she has Windows 7, must have some kind of other version that does not have such a capability.

So, we worked on it long into the night, trying to find a free DVD writing program that is easy enough for her to use. Finally, I remembered that years ago I bought some software for writing DVD's, but I haven't used it in years, but if I search my emails perhaps I might still find the activation code I bought back then, and it might still work on the program if we download the program from the internet.

It worked! Thank giddyness for that. And it's simple enough for Mother to work.

How to work technology if you're over 60

Then, came the huge problem: Teaching Mother to turn on the home entertainment system. Yes, it entails flipping a few switches and turning some stuff on, and Mother and technology haven't been the best of friends.

But, after I drilled her somewhat heavily, we finally got her to remember how to turn it all on tonight for her guests.

Time for the techno portion of the evening

Well, the evening works out splendid! After having sherry by the fireplace, a fire blazing warm and toasty, they come sit on the couches to relive the good old days with Mother's DVD's and a bowl of soup.

Then, one of the guests has a strange request. It's not strange really, it just wasn't foreseen: He has a memory stick on him with a Powerpoint presentation on it, and he wants to show it on our TV.

He seems to want to hand it to me, as he believes since I'm the youngest, I can make it happen. Actually I have no idea how to show a Powerpoint presentation on a memory stick on our TV. Uhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm........

Father goes to get his computer. Does he have Microsoft Office? Yes, turns out he does. Can his computer be connected to our television? I didn't have the faintest idea; we've never done it before.

But, we have had a projector before, and the same cable that goes from the computer to the projector, can be plugged into the TV. Wow, I'm learning something today too!

Eastern Europe, the magical land of somethingorother gets interrupted by update garbage

And so, start our guests' presentation of their time in East Europe. How magical and fantasmagorical! It truly is a land of magic and beauty.

Now what in blazes??? This god damn "Your computer needs to be restarted to complete the updates. Restart now? Restart / Postpone" message keeps popping up. God damn Microsoft ruining the mood.

Well, the lady who's sitting with her husband by the computer, trying to show us their presentation, chooses "Postpone". And the show continues.

Windows wants what it wants and it cares nothing about you, the owner of the computer

But, you guessed it - few minutes later, god damn message pops up again. Again, postpone.

GOD DAMN F IT!!!!! IT'S POPPING UP AGAIN AFTER A WHILE!!! The thing is enough to go insane over.

Seriously, can't Microsoft think to put another choice there, so one can select "Don't ask again"???

Yep, you guessed it - few minutes in, BLOODY SAME POP-UP RUINS THE SHOW AGAIN!!!!!! WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This time the woman just selects "Restart".

But of course that creates a long break, with "Installing updates, Do NOT switch off your computer or disconnect the power".

"More tea?" Mother offers. Nobody wants tea but since they have to wait for the updates, they all just say they'll take tea.

Some minutes later, finally the computer restarts. And, some more updates are configured.

Then, when Windows is finally up, everything needs to be opened up and restarted again and the whole presentation searched through to find the place we were last.

They continue but now the whole atmosphere is ruined and their presenation spoiled.

Oh well. We watch it anyway then we all say goodnight and they leave.

Seriously, if you reading this are a Microsoft employee, STOP MAKING WINDOWS SO GOD DAMN ANNOYING!!! I thank you.

See more on MarzeusVonHemelen.Com


Annoying, Bill Gates, Computer Update, Irritating, Microsoft, Operating System, Update, Windows

Meet the author

author avatar Marzeus von Hemelen
I like eggs for breakfast. I live on top of a hill inside a beautiful but old dwelling complex. I like to take life in through my senses and then give feedback through my writing.

Share this page

moderator Steve Kinsman moderated this page.
If you have any complaints about this content, please let us know


author avatar Fern Mc Costigan
20th Oct 2015 (#)

Interesting post!

Reply to this comment

Add a comment
Can't login?